Satirical Presidential Directive: Politicians to Earn Minimum Wage

This satirical decree tackles the gulf between lavish political pay and the everyday citizen’s struggle. It calls for an end to seven- and eight-figure salaries for elected officials and urges them to join the private sector if they seek financial gain. Lawmakers would only be paid per sitting. No attendance, no allowance. Sleeping through sessions wouldn’t count as participation. Meanwhile, every politician’s monthly pay would match the national minimum wage. If they find it insufficient, they are free to raise it for all Nigerians. Necessary work expenses—official travel, approved accommodation, and communication—remain covered. But luxury convoys, extravagant offices, and five-star meeting venues are banned. Annual public disclosure of all compensation and expenses is mandatory to ensure transparency. This directive aims to restore public service, protect taxpayers, and bring common sense back to governance. It takes effect immediately upon publication.

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